It's been ages since my last post. I've honestly lost interest in blogging, just as i suspected i would when i began this whole thing. Why do it anyway? Same reason you make friends with a total stranger or you try to help someone who would probably turn you down anyway.
We've been doing quite alot of things in school. Between very interactive geography lessons and as usual, very intriguing english classes, i seem to find comfort in writing in my notebook cum journal.
I used to do that last year. I guess i've adopted that habit once more. Sometimes, you just need to write things down right there and then. You know me, always having sudden urges to write.
I don't know why, but suddenly the idea of writing appealed to me once more. Not writing stories, essays or anything of that sort really, just writing. Words have always been special to me. But yes, i did attempt an essay or two, one of which i showed Nyzah.
That girl has managed to come up with scores and scores of nicknames for me. Baggie, Bagedel and Burger being one of the few. Haiz.
You know, sometimes, all it takes for a friendship to blossom are time and basically just patience. I was never on very good terms with some people in my life, but now, it seems that we have come to be good friends.
It amazes me at how much you can do and change if you actually just set your mind to it.
I came across this quote the other day
" Those in power are afraid of giving up because of their lack of trust in others "
How true that is. It reminds me of myself really, and all those times i was picked to be leader of whatever group in school projects. Whenever in a position of power and authority, i would always be afraid of those around me letting the group down. It's as though i believed that without me, we'd fail, because only i knew how to do things right.
Maybe that sounds egotistical, but then, i doubt if only i feel that way. Humans are very complex creatures. I wonder if there could ever come a time when we could understand ourselves properly. Our every action, our every word and thought, the reason and motive behind everything thing we do.
But maybe we aren't ready fo such truths yet.
Hmm
You know, the only reason i'm even writing this is because someone is reading my blog right now. So i make an attempt to keep my blog up to date. Otherwise, i wouldn't bother. Haha, it's like cleaning up the house when you know guests are coming, to make a good impression, make the guests comfortable and well, to even show off.
Maybe i sound so assured and full of myself. But i'm just being honest. And honesty doesn't usually show the good side of you, it shows what's real.
You know, i wonder if maybe, if all of us were blatantly honest about everything, the world would remain as it is? Probably not. That's why there's something called white lie, that's why we go out of our way to make things nicer. For the benefit of society, blablabla. Sugar-coat everything.
I think i'm sounding abit...nasty. Hehe. Well, didn't mean to be. Side-effect of being stuck alone at home with nothing much to do except to study, bleah
:D
