Yoshi, this is going to be another late night post, hee hee

Saa, i am like seriously slacking man. As in, before, when i said slacking, i meant in comparison to people like dee, rahmah, maryam, and basically everyone else, the effort i put in is much lesser. Probably coz my expectations are also much lower, my pace is a very relaxed one. But seriously, at the rate i'm going now, even my chem will be screwed!

Right! Since i hate it when people post about how they're not doing well in some areas coz of their limited effort, i'm not gonna do that. So don't look down on me, minna-san! Hehe, Begum Farah, makenai yo. . . however you spell that ^_^

Ne, you know what? I got a lecture from my uncle earlier on. We sometimes chat online, and he's pretty cool you know. Supportive and all that. Sweet guy. But yeaaa, i totally wasn't expecting a lecture. Haiz. I suppose even he can be a bit of an adult, even though i understand he was really trying to help out.

Still, i won't let his efforts go to waste. In truth, what he said did enlighten me a little. So, it's all good.

Hmn. . . so what do we talk about here on? Saa. . . even i don't know. Can't think of anything. Alright then, let's talk about the first thing that comes to mind.

Writing!

Yea, haha. How typical of me. I miss writing.... it feels like forever since i last wrote. To tell you the truth, i'm a wee bit scared that after my long hiatus ( it's long to me okay! ), i might not be able to reassume my ' writing stance ' hehe. Yea people, i do adopt a certain stance, a ritual if you'd call it, everytime i wanna write. But then, in a way, the long wait makes everything more exciting doesn't it?

I can now hone my writing skills to perfection! Okay, so maybe not perfection. It's like what Ryoma said when Hanamura-sensei wanted to recruit him for Yamabuki Jr High. If he becomes a masterpiece, that means he'll stop, won't he? Because masterpieces have already reached the highest level they can possibly aim for. But to continually aim and progress, you cannot halt, even for a second.

Also, unlike Ryoma after the Kantou Tournament, where he has, in essence, become number one for having defeated Sanada Geneichirou, my passion for writing has not diminished!
Iie. If anything, it burns stronger than ever. Absence makes the heart fonder, does it not?

You know, after i'm done editing stuff, and writing new material, if the response i receive from my stories are satisfactory, i think i want to extend the genre of my stories to yet another one. I've never quite fancy love stories, or anything romantic, because it somehow makes the child in me cringe. It's not i don't believe in love, it's just that, love is so exaggerated. Or too overrated. And i tend to view as overflowing with sticky, sickly sweetness. Like too much cough syrup you know.

But somehow, that childish disdain has made way for an appericiation for love stories. Not much, but it's a start. I have to learn to grow up you know. Maybe i'm just afraid of being labelled as one of those empty headed girls whose heads swims with the impossibility of love that has been portrayed countless of times in fiction or on screens. Impossible love. Fantasies.

Saa, who knows? But anyway, yea. After i have my fun killing off my characters and twisting them in unimaginable ways, i'd love switch to love stories. Challenge myself, no?

Whooaaaa, this is soo exciting. There are soo many genres, so many possibilities i could explore and make mine! Haha, i'm getting pumped up! At this point, all i want to do is to write really. To post stuff. Especially to post stuff. Somehow, the most rewarding part of wrting, is when you get response. Because you know there are people who actually notice your hard work. Even better, are good responses! Coz, not only are you being recognised, but you're being appericiated. And for such an attention seeker like me, that kind of thing is brilliant, really! I mean, what's better than having people inflate your already oversized head? hehe

Oh yea. . . fanfiction too. I'm thinking of concentrating on that, though, i'm not very good at that. Coz, you have to continue on from characters that you didn't construct. A compensation is that you love them, and it is within your powers to give them a role from which you can manipulate their lives somewhat. but yeah, capturing the very essence of who they are, that is the tough part. But, no big. Fanfics are fun! And DN too. yes Mary, i am most definitely venturing into the world of DN. I must leave my mark there. I have read countless DNs, fell in love with all the different stories whose sole purpose is to give a happy ending to our beloved characters. Now, as an avid supporter and reader, i must join the ranks of those who bring pleasure to the minds of others who are, just like us, in love with the ehem, prowess of our wonderful prince of tennis characters.

Ore-sama no bigi ni, yoina! ( again, however you spell that. Feel free to correct me, Mary )

Hehe, that line reminds me of ' Tango towards destruction ' the two-part version of ' Rondo towards destruction ' that Sanada and Atobe perfected during the Goodwill games, during the first of the doubles match. Hehe, to think it came about from them happening to watch a latin music concert together. haa, music. The power of music. It must not be underestimated!

Yoshi! I feel like opening my chem book. And so i will, hehe. You know, studying really is fun. Or rather, studying something you like, it really is enjoyable. The problem is opening the book really. But then, once you do, closing it is tough. Somewhat ^_^

Like maths. E maths is fun. I almost forgot how much i love e maths. But once i started it, i threw myself into it. We tangoed around numbers and formulas, questions and equations, and ultimately, we found answers. Hey, i think there's a story in here somewhere. Hmn.

Inspiration strikes again! I was right! My muse has not been lost yet! One day, i'm going to learn how to draw. And i'm going to perfect my drawing skills, yes perfect. Because the art of drawing is something i think, will be purely for my own enjoyment, thus, it is entirely possible for it to have a limit somewhere, even though i hate that word, limit, it is binding and constricting. But in this matter, it's of no importance really. So long my skills will be good enough. Then, i will one day, finally give my muse a proper form. Somehow, the idea of doing just that, it's thrilling.

Though, truth be told, i don't know if my muse DOES want a form. Being intangible, shapeless, that gives it it's dreamlike quality. But who knows, it might change it's mind. I might change my mind. But that's not for a very long time. So it's a decision that can wait.

Hai hai . . i've had so much fun typing out this blog this time. Blogging has always been fun. Especially since there is hardly any anonymity this time, since Amal and Maryam are erm, the word destined comes to mind, to read this. Hehe, destined? ^_^"

Anyway, yea. I like being heard, no? I'm an attention seeking prat baby, and i'm loving it!
Haha. Ah well. Anyway, like i said, this time round, the fun was like, increased by tenfold! So, arigatou, for this feeling of euphoria. Haha, you know, i think i've been half subconciously shaping myself to be like Kikumaru, hehe. Guilty. Can't help it, his effervescent nature has rubbed off on me, and since all i want is to be happy and to have fun in all the things i do, that includes studying and even while taking exams! it works, no?

Right, i really need to put an end to this. So, ja ne. Matte raishu! or not, hee ^_^

lots of love to minna-san,
cheers!